
“I can’t wait to see that little fucker get his due,” says Bethany Thompson, referring to her son, Jason. “He’s been a pain all year…now, now he’ll know what it’s like to suffer.”
Bethany, like many parents of naughty children, awaits with much anticipation the arrival of Christmas Eve, for she knows that with it comes the arrival of the Krampus. “I’m so delighted,” she exclaims, “As Santa will be rightfully rewarding the good little boys and girls with presents, I know my child will be beaten raw through the wrath of the Krampus.”
Unbeknownst to most citizens, the Krampus has long been counterpart to Santa Claus, riding alongside ‘ol Saint Nick and dispensing punishment to children who have been naughty all year. Carl Saberhagan, public liaison elf for the North Pole, explains why many are unaware of his existence. “Listen,” he says, “it’s tough enough trying to pass off a fat bearded man breaking into a third of the houses in the world in one night just to leave presents and eat cookies as being legit. It takes powerful magic to pull that off year after year. But all the magic in existence wouldn't be able to gloss over the PR nightmare that would develop if people knew he was accompanied by a demonic horned figure brandishing a birch rod that he uses to strike naughty children severely. Parents of these naughty children understand, but they are the exception. So, we conjured up that silly coal-in-the-stocking story to placate the rest of the masses. Plus, we’d never move as much Santa-related merch if he was depicted next to his hell-beast accomplice.”
Still, parents of naughty children feel that a heightened awareness of the Krampus could lead to better behavior in much of society’s youth. “I’m telling ya,” states Maryann Scimone, mother of 4 – “With all the shit my kids have caused this year, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the Christmas that the Krampus finally puts them in his magical basket and drags them down into the bowels of hell. If more people knew of this, we’d have a lot more well behaved kids out there.”
Perhaps in time these parents will get their wish, as awareness of the Krampus’ existence continues to unfold. In Germanic regions of the world, knowledge of the Krampus has rested comfortably with the people there for centuries. “Yeah, it takes a lot to faze those people,” Carl tells us. “An evil creature torturing children on Christmas Eve is actually quite tame for them.”
Bethany, like many parents of naughty children, awaits with much anticipation the arrival of Christmas Eve, for she knows that with it comes the arrival of the Krampus. “I’m so delighted,” she exclaims, “As Santa will be rightfully rewarding the good little boys and girls with presents, I know my child will be beaten raw through the wrath of the Krampus.”
Unbeknownst to most citizens, the Krampus has long been counterpart to Santa Claus, riding alongside ‘ol Saint Nick and dispensing punishment to children who have been naughty all year. Carl Saberhagan, public liaison elf for the North Pole, explains why many are unaware of his existence. “Listen,” he says, “it’s tough enough trying to pass off a fat bearded man breaking into a third of the houses in the world in one night just to leave presents and eat cookies as being legit. It takes powerful magic to pull that off year after year. But all the magic in existence wouldn't be able to gloss over the PR nightmare that would develop if people knew he was accompanied by a demonic horned figure brandishing a birch rod that he uses to strike naughty children severely. Parents of these naughty children understand, but they are the exception. So, we conjured up that silly coal-in-the-stocking story to placate the rest of the masses. Plus, we’d never move as much Santa-related merch if he was depicted next to his hell-beast accomplice.”
Still, parents of naughty children feel that a heightened awareness of the Krampus could lead to better behavior in much of society’s youth. “I’m telling ya,” states Maryann Scimone, mother of 4 – “With all the shit my kids have caused this year, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the Christmas that the Krampus finally puts them in his magical basket and drags them down into the bowels of hell. If more people knew of this, we’d have a lot more well behaved kids out there.”
Perhaps in time these parents will get their wish, as awareness of the Krampus’ existence continues to unfold. In Germanic regions of the world, knowledge of the Krampus has rested comfortably with the people there for centuries. “Yeah, it takes a lot to faze those people,” Carl tells us. “An evil creature torturing children on Christmas Eve is actually quite tame for them.”
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